I’ve been bleak of late. In fact, since October. It comes in varying waves of intensity that are only exacerbated by, oh, life.
So, in an attempt to be more positive and less narky I have decided to compile a list of events, things, experiences in 2006 that were good, made me laugh, bought me joy or made me cry but in a good way. As opposed to the things that were suckful, which you’ve all heard me bang-on about too long and too hard for our collective good.
- Oscar’s experience and growth from being in a mainstream class, and how his school and classmates have embraced him for who he is. The road is still long and rocky and bloody foggy, which irritates the shit out of me, but hey, i’ve trying to be upbeat here.
- Felix learning to read and writing stories about things we do on the weekend, which are so much cooler than the things we really did on the weekend. His calling of a family conference to change his name to Obi-Wan. The earnest asking on Christmas morning, “where is my second present from Santa? The laptop I asked for?” The emotional maturity in my little man that sometimes worries me more than being the heart warmer it normally is – e.g. tonight he said, “When someone dies you hold them in your heart so that you’ll never ever forget them.” The excitedness he has in him, which I recognise so clearly in me, that you can literally feel bubbling up inside you and leads to loud voices, even louder laughing and saying the wrong or inappropriate thing – and that I hope he learns to keep it in check a lot younger than I ever did but only when he needs to!
- I’m really quite relieved that I find the whole Star Wars concept entertaining, clever and watchable an infinite number of times.
- That another remarkable twist of fertility fate meant that, ahem, activities in 2006 will see the completion of our family in 2007.
- My friends – in real life – who when I am down, when shitty things happen, when great things occur – are there to share it with me, carry me when needed and always always always make me laugh. Their generosity of spirit takes my breath away.
- My family – yes, they* drive me completely bonkers, but again, their dedication to my children is astounding and something I am truly grateful for, to the bottom of my heart.
- The revelation that Jasper is each and every day. Did I miss this with the first two? The absolute joy of a personality being revealed each and every day? That he has clear word associations and can act on them – close the door, bathtime, would you like a bottle, are you hungry, where’s hippo, say nigh-nigh. The blowing of kisses, the obsession with being outside, the pushing dogs aside then tormenting them as they sit by and take it, the absolute love affair he is having with Chef, which neither of the older boys had until very recently. He will actually look at me with derision if Chef is present and therefore the go-to parent. I find this beguiling to say the least.
- Watching my husband grown as a person. This year he has been the man I knew he could be. As a parent he is stunning. As a husband, just wonderful and as a person, the loveliest I could ever know. He’s funny, sensitive and dedicated. My man.
- Here. This place is my solace. I believe it’s been important in not letting me fall completely over the cliff of depression many times over. Thank you for indulging me and my petty grievances with the world. They’re not much in the grand scheme of things, but they’re mine.
- This year hasn’t been one of reading for me. Children, work and life have kind of got in the way. I’m back at uni for one semester in 2007 which will force me into reading, but ’06 has been my year of mindless TV. Thank you America’s Next Top Model, Rockstar Super Nova, Grand Designs, Nigella, Love My Way, Spicks and Specks, This Old House, reruns of Seinfeld and Sex and the City, Arrested Development, Curb my Enthusiasm and The Daily Show with Jon Stewart. It’s been fun. I promise there will be more literature and less popular culture in 2007.
* only my family, Chef’s family ROCKS.