Beginnings – UPDATED (with a shout-out thanks to Sooz)

I guess you’ve all noticed the narky depressive fug that has descended over me. Sorry about that.

I keep reading everyone’s blog posts and tweets and facebook messages of well wishes and excitement about the year ahead. And you know, I could do all that in a snap – OH here’s to 2010, may it be filled with joy and bounty! This year is going to be a good one. I CAN FEEL IT!

But you know what? My Oprah/Dr Phil/The Secret gene mutated some time ago and now I just see it for what it is.

The process of time.

There will be joy and fun and good things.
There will be shit and hell and dark days.

I guess for me it is now having the capacity to see that the dark days do end and that the good times are often there when you least expect them and appear in the most delicious of ways – like a friend sending you material for your first ever quilt, for an unexpected email or parcel in the mail and unanticipated adventures. But you know, the good times from my boys saying something funny or their face when they see you after a day at school or the unplanned activities after school or the dinner conversation which makes everyone laugh or even the quiet that descends on the house when they all go to bed bring me about as much joy as anything else.

But I just can’t do the chipper shit. It’s with a weary resignation that I approach 2010 – more wet beds, more gastro bugs that expose me to more bodily fluids from other people than I ever never imagined would be possible, more financial grief and so on and so forth.

I know there’ll be good times, I know I KNOW.

So with this framework I give you my goals for 2010:
1. To do something each and every day towards securing a regularly published column of my writing.
2. To self-publish a series of cookbooks with Chef (first one ear-marked for March!).
3. To learn hand embroidery.
4. To find something fun and rewarding for myself when the times are the darkest and hardest (eg – I’ve already flagged with eleanorfromthecommentbox that I will be falling on her/loitering at her house when Oscar is in hospital (which is quite close to her house))
5. To call and talk shit with my friends a whole lot more than I have in the last decade.
6. To get to Melbourne again and talk shit with friends and go fabric shopping.
7. To get out to NSW’s Central West Slopes and Plains to sniff the newborn head of my best-friend’s third child.


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  • sooz

    5. To waste time talking shit with mates.
    6. Visit Melbourne and stay with friends and go fabric shopping and talk shit with mates.

    I could go on, but if I mention yarn I might tip you over the edge.

    We'll be there in the darkness too, not just the light. Wishing you all the luck in the world babe.

  • blackbird

    I don't quite get why people pin their hopes for change and luck on the New Year…and I do look forward to good things, though I know there will be bad times too, so I'm with you attitude wise.

  • BabelBabe

    I. Love. You.

    That is all.

  • BabelBabe

    oh, an happy fucking new year : )

  • Janet

    Mmm yeah, I can't do a year in review type post right now as I seem to be wearing my shit tinted glasses quite a bit at the moment – but resolving something doable and staying in the moment (especially when it's a good one, the bad ones, eh not so much) – well that seems the only way forward to me.

    All the best for next year, and here's to hoping there are some umimagined lovely surprises and good fortune in there among the hard stuff!

  • peskypixies

    yup…I know just how you feel…..
    I cant see anyway out of my fog though……..


  • Kate

    I've been putting off a new year post, as well. I mean, I'm actually feeling quite positive. For me. But that just means that that's what I'm focusing on, not that I think there will only be good things.

    I was making a chipper comment on someone else's blog, and I had to go have a lie down because my take on 'happy happy' was 'isn't it wonderful how fresh and promising the new year seems? Let's enjoy it while it lasts.'

    Sigh. My positivity might need some work… on the other hand, at least I'm not going to be TOO disappointed!

  • Matthew Gain

    I look forward to working on the social media and Pr strategy for your first cook book.

  • Kill

    7. I shall scrape off some vernix and keep it for you in a jar (just in case you are delayed)