There are quite a few of you who will remember this.With all the gory details here  for those who want to catch up.

So somehow, someway, we blinked and went from this:

To this:

Wait, that doesn’t show him in all his shiny glory:

To celebrate, I made him a birthday cake shaped like a giant penis. No really.

He wanted a rocket cake. Told me so when he saw a picture of Oscar’s 6th birthday cake the day after his third birthday last year. So look, a penis with wings!

And you know, once those wings had been there for a while? Not helping.

Naturally, while all the puerile adults were giggling and being, well, puerile the kids thought the rocket was awesome.

Then there was the cutting of the cake. You know, if this child is the gay one, going off how he cut the cake, heaven help his partner.

Then the adults were even more gutter-humoured because it appeared I’d even paid attention to the, ah, internal anatomical details.

Yep, the kids are getting older which means we are too, but still with the penis jokes. What was worse was most of the family in attendance have all been suffering some sort of weird malaise which has involved ahh, lets say the need to be not too far from a bathroom and a reticence to fart for fear more than air will appear. So yeah, there were the kids happily eating cake and running around with each other while the grown ups grossed each other out with fart jokes, stories of  bottom blow-outs and giggling at the iced phallus.

And this:

is the best shot of the whole family from the 17 taken.

So – the Jasper boy is four. It seems we’ve moved through the particularly horrid time that is three – you know, the year of the screamy McScreamy Pants routine when the air particles aren’t quite how they should be.

We’re still in the five food groups of salt and vinegar potato chips, hot chips (or crispy – they have to be CRISPY! – roast potatoes), boiled rice, plain pasta and white toast with butter. But now sometimes grapes are OK. Even watermelon! Sometimes roast chicken is acceptable as is roast lamb but there must be home-made gravy. Sometimes cruskits instead of toast! Occasionally sultanas! What can I say, I somehow produced a child who can almost solely exist on air.

He is a funny little kid, full of funny walks and faces. Always singing or telling you a story. Always in for a cuddle and perfectly capable of holding his own against his big brothers thank you very much.

When he came into the world we called him our little ray of sunshine. His arrival seemed to truly make us, to lift us from some sort of survival zone to a family. I just don’t know how to explain it better than that. And you know, he still is that orb of light in the room.

So happy birthday happy shiny little man. We love you more than you will ever comprehend.


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  • Badger

    Aw, happy birthday to Jasper! And Kim, how will you EVER top the penis cake? (Hee!)

  • saffronlie

    That is a rocking cake, phallic shapes be damned! Sounds like quite a party. Love the photos.

  • kim at allconsuming

    Badge – hopefully one of them will one day ask for a cake shaped like a mussel.

  • kim at allconsuming

    And my eyebrows look really thin. They are the bane of my life – either old man caterpillar monobrow or too thin. Gah.

  • M

    absolutely CRYING with laughter. I'm definitely one of the puerile adults.

    Happy 4th birthday Jasper!

  • Anonymous

    The penis cake!!!
    You are A.W.E.S.O.M.E.
    Happy birthday to Jasper.

  • blackbird

    Happy day to your sweet fellow!

    (Here's hoping my boys don't ever see that cake. Am esp. impressed with the, uh, urethra of icing!)

  • Anonymous

    You have killed me dead with that penis cake. Thank you for the best laugh in weeks. A very Happy Birthday to that Shiny Little Man of yours.


  • ThirdCat

    That is fucking hilarious…sorry to be so crude, but there is nothing for it…

  • Eleanor

    That really IS fucking hilarious.

    Did my use of the F word sound convincing to you? I've been practicing.

    Happy birthday Jasper xxxxxxxx

  • Frogdancer

    Happy birthday Jasper!

  • Aussie-waffler

    Happy Birthday to your little ray of sunshine. Hilarious post (and cake, bless)and it's lovely to be able to put a face to your name 🙂

  • Anonymous

    That was the most moving dedication. I loved how you felt like he transformed you guys into a family. So precious. Happy Birthday little Libran. May your days be filled with your own definition of beauty, balance and harmony. Calli xx

  • Angie

    Goodness knows how I meandered to this post but THANK YOU!! I've just been nearly wetting myself reading (or trying to read) this post. That was the best laugh I have had in ages. My partner kept looking over (his still stuck in a grump that he must have caught from me) saying

    "what could be so funny?"
    "you're about to wake the kids!"
    "did you just snort?"

  • •´.¸¸.•¨¯`♥.Trish.♥´¯¨•.¸¸.´•

    ho my gosh….hilarious. Thank you for sharing , I needed a BIG giggle.

  • •´.¸¸.•¨¯`♥.Trish.♥´¯¨•.¸¸.´•

    PS His eating habits sound lie one of my own 4yr olds. Happy mealtimes are NOT !