So You Think You Can Dance – LIVE!

So Natalie I love the th Basingthwaithe is channelling Barbarella. She must have taken my advice from last week as her sleepy-eyes are lookiPOng a lot less sleepy.

I didn’t know Jason had worked in the public service – he’s got his office cardy on tonight – the sort with knitted sleeves but a leather body. Noice Jase, roilly noice.

First up Jemma and Rhys doing hip hop
OH my LORD does that opening move make does that make her arse look big or make her arse look big.
They are pretty much on fire.
The crowd is going off.
Funny hearing all these girls scream for a scrawny gay cross dressing* man taking his shirt off.
I thought they were freakin’ amazing.
Bonnie is just SO annoying isn’t she. Stupid sexual innuendo jokes that aren’t even funny.
Jas is being suitably intense. It would be concerning if he wasn’t. It’s funny seeing humourless people try and crack funnies isn’t it. It’s just so forced, like they’ve been practicing it in their head over and over before the delivery…

What does everyone think of the Bonds undies ad with all the girls dancing?
I lurve it.
It makes me want to be young and nubile.
The music is catchy and they all seem to be having so much fun.
Even though they’re all so thin. And toned.
Sigh.

We’re up to Demi and Jack doing the rhumba.
Stupid pre-story about how being sexual with each other is weird.
I think they’re doing an awesome job- it’s like they’ve all stepped up to the plate this week – so much less lame than last week.
Judges are quite critical.

*we interrupt this broadcast to help children do a wee on Tommy Turtle and put children to bed and breast feed*

Now it’s Anthony and Laura.
It’s weird ‘contemporary’ – dance with a story.
It doesn’t really work.
I’ve decided the judges love Anthony (rightly so, he is – from my so learned dance experience – incredibly talented) and don’t love Laura so much.
They seem quite brutal.

Camilla and Sermsah have got hip hop.
These guys are my favourites. I’m nervous for them.
. . .
Well I think they rocked it.
It looked a little clunky in the middle, but I liked it.
Camilla is FREAKIN’ awesome. Girl crush is underway.
I didn’t even notice Sermsah. Whoops.
Judges are a mixed bag – loving Camilla, pushing Sermsah

I’m kinda hoping that these guys and Anthony and Laura are bottom three, so Sermsah and Laura can be ditched and Anthony and Camilla can dance together.

Vanessa and Henry are doing samba.
Vanessa’s voice simultaneously makes my neck itch and shits me to tears.
It makes me want to hurt her.
Henry’s had a haircut and looks a lot less Shire. Noice.
Matt calls it a transformation and indeed it is.
It just seems like such a weird pairing.
WomanChild with HotSpunk.
But then they’re really really good.
She is a very very good dancer.
They’re probably one of the few pairs where you try and actively watch them both at the same time and give yourself a headache doing so.
I think we can say that that.was.simply.amazing.
Jason, bless him, just got his saying around the wrong way – saying that if you looked up the choreographer in the dictionary the meaning would be brilliant. Um, isn’t it meant to be if you looked up brilliant there’d be a photo of the choreographer??
I’m just asking.

Kate and Graeme are doing contemporary.
I like these guys – last week was the first week they danced together but they both seem like really nice people. Very open and smiley.
I really am quite the authority tonight aren’t I.
They’re dancing to one of my favourite songs of all time – Coldplay’s Fix You.
I think they’re rocking it big time.
Jase loved it a hundred times over and so did I.
They’re hustling in on my love for Camilla.
These guys – after only dancing together for two weeks – are the strongest pair by far.

Ooo, trainwreck couple are up. Rhiannon and JD doing a top hat and tails jazz routine.
Oh MAN there is so much unison work, which they seem to be pulling off.
They actually seem to be having fun – and snaps to them for coming back from last week because, I mean, how much pressure after last week’s debacle.
Judges love it, lots of love in the room.
Phew.

* Remind me to tell you a funny story about that later.