Idol ruminations – first final

When I watch Idol I tend to sit on the lounge with a very pained expression on my face. As if I’m waiting for the person to go pitchy. To forget their lines. To fall off the stage. To go running off the stage into the audience and then not know how to get back up on the stage. To have a wardrobe malfunction. I actually get tenser and tenser as the night proceeds and have to make myself drop my shoulders and remember to breath. My life is that rich and fulfilling.

Moving on.

Favourite performance of the night:
OMGoodness me, Matt Corby just rocked the house. I know that should read rok’d da house, but work with me. He nailed a Coldplay song and put some grunt in it. Grunt Chris Martin could never muster because he’s so weak from too many soya beans and not enough eating of the carnivorous kind. Again, hair styling to put a woman to shame. I still marvel that this guy is 16 and I love how his mum just tears up.

Biggest disappointment:
My favourite of the whole lot, Brianna Carpenter, did a Beach Boys song and even I knew the ‘p’ word was going to be raised. Pitchy. She was pitchy. No where near as bad as the biggest disappointment of the Top 24 Jesse Curran when she attempted a U2 song, but still, it can be a quick death. She just needs to stay kooky and Dicko be damned.

Most irritating:
Lana Kroft stole Cheray Doughty’s spot because she scored all the 12 year old girl, ENTIRE Western Australia and sympathy vote because look, I’m teeny, I’m young, I am Cosette. The sooner she gets booted off and can go back to community musical theatre performances, preferably involving jazz hands, the better.

Most boring:
Oh hairy Daniel Misfud how you irritate me so. The high hair. That forced intensity. You’ll last a few weeks until people tire of you and go ‘Daniel who?’. Next!

Biggest surprise:
See this picture <--? You can see she's wearing something with braces. You see that safe blonde bob haircut. She comes from a country town. So pretty quick you start forming stereotypes about her. But you know what? She came on stage tonight to kick those stereotypes right up the clacker. Seriously. She was scary. The hair could have been a bit more Pink and a little less Olivia Newton-John in You’re the One That I Want . But otherwise she kicked arse and she kicked it scary hard. I liked her and now I like her A LOT.

Enjoyable and snaps for going first and not falling in a heap:
Ben McKenzie’s great and I think did a really good job, particularly in light of the fact he was first up. He’ll be fun to watch until his balls drop voice breaks and then it will be bloody. Then again, he could be our new Ben Lee and that could be interesting, particularly as he doesn’t seem to have one millionth the ego Ben Lee has. And he doesn’t see the need to wear suit jackets with cut off sleeves and zipped up tracksuit tops underneath with a tie, which just makes me hot. And not in a good way.

Most weird but jog it in for pulling it off:
Carl Risley you mad crazy navy man. You chose Waltzing Matilda? And did a variation of it? While wearing a Panama Hat? But seemed really relaxed and seemed to be having fun and seemed to pull it off. Jog it in buddy, jog it in.

And who’s a big boy now:
Oh Jacob Butler, all that self doubt. All those nerves. So clearly thrown to the wind as you shook out that moroon velvet jacket and wasn’t it worth it?! Didn’t you have fun! Your performance was fun and enjoyable.

Most predictable and again with the black jeans?
Tarisai Vushe sang a big song. Next.

Gong for the Balladrear and again with the black tights?
OK I admit it, TiNatalie Gauci-Arena’s performance tonight was pretty darn good and she actually looked pretty darn good too. Darn it all to hell.

Ah nerves, they’re a killer:
As Dicko said, it was uncomfortable to watch. Poor Marty Simpson who I keep thinking comes from the Shire but actually comes from the Coast (as in Central) looked so damn nervous it was hard to watch. He also sang a Police song which was interesting but it lacked the pissed-off it needed to be pulled off. Still, he wins points for the fact his Dad said this “was the most exciting thing to happen since I won five numbers in Lotto”. Bless him.

It’s to be expected:
Mark Da Costa rocked. He’s either going to get better or go the way of Daniel Misfed. Musfed. Misfad. Mis…

And the candle, flickering in the wind, still burns for:
Cheray Doughty. Robbed.