Code red: pregnant crank… again

bigandlittle and I are due on the same day for baby #4. It’s like we’re living mirrored lives. The shuffling, the crankiness, the quietness, the w.a.i.t.i.n.g. The biggest difference between us is that she knows she’s having a girl, Hilary, while we are completely in the dark as to whether our newest recruit will be a pink or blue one.

Can I just say, if one more person says to me “oh, you must be hoping for a girl” I am going to find the nearest twig blown in from our freakish weather of late and repeatedly jab it into their eye.

I know you know from my tone that I am serious.

Maybe it’s because I’ve got a child with a dodgy chromosome, maybe it’s because even when I was at highschool I said I’d probably only produce boys, maybe it’s because I think as a parent of boys, as a mother to boys, when I’m not brain crazy, I rock.
But no, I’m not hoping for a girl, I’m not hoping for a boy.
I’m hoping for a child who in the first instance will be a sleeping non screamer who is quite adept at breastfeeding.
Then I am hoping for a little person to have come into our lives who will have a life which is happy, full of love and laughter and in the early years, one in which they feel safe enough to discover who they are and what they want to be.
Then I want that child to grow into an adult with a solid understanding of responsibility and self reliance. An adult with empathy and compassion, leadership and creativity.
But most of all, I want a child who will, whatever stage of their life, be able to get to the end of each day and say “I tried my hardest and did my best”.

So stick that in your pipe and smoke it.