do you want to know?

just how many pairs of jeans I own?
7. S.e.v.e.n.

how many fit?
0. z.e.r.o.
If blogger let me, that would be a big f.a.t. zero.

There’s the
– traditional 501s that I bought when I lost 22 kilos in 1995-1996
– the fancy made-just-for-me Wilgenhof’s made by Paddi G who Chef used to work with (these have never fitted)
– the Jag pair I bought when I had turned 30 and lost about 15 kilos that rocked
– a pair of high waisted Jeans West that I have no idea where they came from, but I suspect were my fat jeans at some point
– the Portmans low waisted ones with two buttons at the waist which I loved and thought in the shop “I only need to lose about 2kgs for these to look hot” so never lost the weight and instead had another baby so have never worn
– the other Portmans pair I bought at the same time which did fit and which l lived in the winter before last (in high rotation with the Jag pair)
– a faded pair of Jeans West which I must have lived in at some time because they’re really worn and soft. They do up but the muffin top is so hideous they are simply not an option.

Look away, I’m hideous.