Every bad thing, every gripe, every petty quibble I have raised here about my mother and husband I take back.

As some form of green phlegm monster attacks my sinuses so badly it feels either my eardrum will burst or my teeth will just fall from my gums, as some hacking cough makes me feel like labour is starting and pushed my bellybutton out and – again- tests the capacity, or lack thereof, of my pelvic floor, as my head is wracked with an ache only exacerbated by both the above, my mother has taken control of the children and AB has built an entire Ikea wardrobe system – in less than a day – and,

I’m crawling back to bed now, but I am feeling very blessed.